I think it looks good. "Mathematical questions related to current research in mathematics" seems like a reasonable thing to say, but it appears three times in the first few paragraphs. The entire sentence "MathOverflow's primary goal is for users to ask and answer mathematical questions related to current research in mathematics." appears twice. Removing the sentence the first time it appears would be an improvement, in my opinion.

@JonEricson: Thanks! I know nothing about this and should probably shut up and let the people like you who understand the issues do their thing. Nonetheless two things occur to me. One is: maybe people neglect to write http; maybe someone with better search skills than me could see how much that happens. Another one is: could the regex look for whatever it is in the markup we use that encodes that something is a clickable link?

To me, it seems unlikely that any non-proxy URL would include the phrase "proxy". Maybe just search for that? (I say this as someone who has accidentally included a proxy URL in an answer and whose institution does not have ".edu" in its URL.

According to my understanding, downvotes on meta are supposed to signal "I don't like the proposed change" rather than "this was a bad question". So don't worry about them in this case.

I was one of the people voting to close. I thought there were trivial counter-examples. I realize now that my trivial counter-examples are not counter-examples. My apologies to the OP.